I don’t curse. I don’t drink. I don’t smoke. I was a Girl Scout at 10 years old and am still wearing the badges (on the inside). And that’s why I am qualified to say, “Sometimes you just have to write with a little FU in you.”
It’s not always good to be so good.
There’s this teeny little pattern called People Pleasing. Heaven knows it’s hard to shake. Not wanting to ruffle feathers. Wanting everyone to be happy and included. Wanting to be liked and loved. Striving for your writing to be valued and of importance. It’s a great big ball of stress, insecurity and fear.
For a writer, People Pleasing is debilitating. I’d dare say it’s the #1 reason that we get stuck. Here’s the hard truth: You are not going to please everyone. But, I’ll be darned if you don’t please at least SOMEONE with your writing: YOU.
Yes, writing for your audience is important. Yes, editing and paring down your work is essential. None of this matters if your pipes get clogged and you get stuck in the muck.
Why come from a place of FU? Accessing a little anger can help break through to higher emotions like contentment and joy — anger is a higher vibrating emotion than fear or insecurity. I’m not suggesting that you stay angry. Use it to break through. (Check out this Emotional Guidance Scale for some incredible details.)
This is your writing. This is your life. So, put a little chutzpah in your step. And forget about the world for a moment. Forget that anyone else exists. Lie down and put your legs up the wall. Go for a walk somewhere you’ve never been, barefoot. Then just write. Forget about trying to make it sound profound. Forget about whether it’s publishable. Write to bare your soul and share your mind. Write to hear the music of the syllables strung together. Write like you are a child, too young to care what people think. That’s where the magic lives.
Editing is a completely separate venture. You’ll get to that later.
For now, write like no one is watching. Unless someone is. In that case, close your blinds and call 9-1-1.